What is the essence of being a man?

In Når det jeg egentlig vil er at du skal holde rundt meg (When what I really want is for you to hold me), the Norwegian majority man is put under the microscope in a warm, naked and funny performance about the male role. Is there a core to being a man, something we can agree on, or are there only paradoxes, contradictions and differences? Is the male role as free and spacious as we want it to be? And what's the point of talking about roles when we want to free ourselves from them?

A female facilitator has placed three men on stage, in a maximalist and stereotypical man cave, to examine the male stereotypes and ideals of our time. She herself sits in a control room next to the stage, observing and studying the men. She interacts directly with them via video. The stage space becomes our "research laboratory". Through the interaction between the actors and honest confessions to the audience, the performance aims to understand more about what it is like to be a man today. The men will never escape the gaze of each other, the women or the audience, which turns the idea of men as subjects and observers upside down.

Exploring themes around gender roles and self-image has been a common thread in Katja B. Lindeberg's artistic practice, thematized in several performances for both children and adults. With the audience success "Bare en våd munn" (Only a wet mouth) (2018), Lindeberg focused on women. This is the sequel: A performance about socially constructed masculinity and male experiences related to being a man in today's Norway.

80% of the text material for the performance is taken directly from interviews and conversations with men of different ages and backgrounds, as well as from the company's own research. They have traveled to a men's conference in Berlin, participated in a dragking workshop and been hunting, carved a man cave and talked about feelings - all to get closer to what it means to be a man.

The artist's own words about the project:

"Why am I doing this? Why this great interest in men? Do I crave a masculinity I don't feel I've been allowed to possess as a woman? Do I have an anger towards men I've given too much power to define? An anger towards powerful men I have coveted, sought confirmation from and been afraid of. Do I want to get under their skin? Undress them? Get behind the role so I can be close? Find a space for vulnerability? Perhaps I am creating the distance myself, by giving men power? Perhaps I am reinforcing and projecting the ideal of a strong stoic man onto the men I meet? And am I not then also helping to uphold these ideas and restrict his room for maneuver? 

I hope we can create a wise performance - funny, warm and important. A show that gets the audience to leave the auditorium and start talking about their own experiences. Because there are many answers to the questions we ask. There are many answers to what it means to be human."

- Katja B. Lindeberg.

Photo: Torstein Uthaug and Signe Luksengård